Monday, January 19, 2009

Out With the Gross.

On top of the whole “let’s be creative and make stuff” challenge for the New Year, I also decided to do the whole “let’s join a gym and get in shape” challenge. It was the next item to check off on my cliché list of things to do, right after start a blog (check!) and do a cleanse (check!). Clearly, I’m on a roll. Take that 2009!

Jubbers and I joined a gym last Monday and according to the ads they play over the intercom, people are 80% more likely to stick to a gym routine if they have a gym buddy. This is a very reassuring stat. After signing all the paper work and forking over the cash, one of the trainers did our body composition. I was very pleased to see that after almost 9 years of not going to the gym, I was 19% body fat. Woot. So on Wednesday when Jubb Jubb and Rutty went to the gym, I skipped out, bought light bulbs and started a blog. It’s okay, I’m 19% body fat. On Saturday we had another appointment at the gym where they took measurements and did another measure of body composition. This time I was 23% body fat, up by 4% in three days. Boourns. I call bullshit. I had another appointment this morning to go through how to use the different machines and suggestions for exercises. Apparently if I want more of a personalized routine, I’d have to pay for a session with a trainer. Already I’m discovering my hatred for cardio. And my gym buddy doesn’t want to go to the gym at 6am. This isn’t looking good for the hero.

A couple of weeks ago, a group of us decided to do the DrNatura Colonix cleanse. We ordered the kits online and a few people chose to start right away. I wanted to hold off. There are five of us at work, including our boss, who are doing this cleanse and with the new studio space still under construction, there would only be one good bathroom until the rest of the space was complete. I was told this would be at least a couple of weeks after we moved. Forty sum odd people in the studio with about twenty more starting in the next week or so, and one bathroom. Add the five people on a cleanse…Yikes. I was the only one who hadn’t started and they all assured me that they didn’t feel the need to run to the toilet every few minutes. They didn’t notice an increase in frequency, just the amount that came out. The other difference was they now felt compelled to discuss their poop. Based on this information, I started my cleanse on Saturday. It’s now the end of day 2 and I’m anxious to feel a difference. So far nothing but it’s probably too soon. The DrNatura site boasts an impressive photo gallery of the demon alien babies people have exorcised from their bowels. I want that too. But sadly, I haven’t yet experienced anything that has compelled me to discuss my poop. Don’t worry; I won’t be posting any photos. It doesn’t really qualify as a weekly creative feat. I guess that's debatable.

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